The Relationship Catch 22

Let's pretend there is this guy. Be sure to recognize that this guy isn't me. To make sure this guy isn't me we will call him Frank. He will have red, curly hair. I don't have red, curly hair. He also has an extensive ABBA collection which is also something I don't nor would never have. Let's not dwell on his poor music taste but instead get to this tale. Just so the girls can play at this game too, you can pretend that Frank is a girl and her name is Francine. She is more of a Jars of Clay fan and has long black hair. She also is not me.

Have we established this isn't me yet?

So, Frank finds himself falling for a very good friend of his. His friend just happens to be a girl which is probably one of the reasons he fell for her. In Francine's case, she fell for a guy who also is not me -- for the record. Though she'd have a better chance with me because she has a better musical taste alone -- plus she's a girl. So Frank/Francine had this really great friend. This friend that they spent lots of time with and felt they could totally connect with. For a long while, all he/she felt for this person was friendship. The cruellness of life has caused them to have other feelings. Those feelings just happen to be really strong for this person. You can't blame Frank/Francine because the object of their affection just happens to be a really amazing friend and person.

Frank/Francine decides to take the plunge and admit their feelings to their friend. Even though they don't know how the friend may feel back. As this story decides to tell itself, it just so happens this friend does not return those feelings. This person has decided that the friendship route is the better route. Frank/Francine is a little hurt but values the friendship so much that they decide to not let it get to them.

The decision is made between the two that nothing will change between them They will remain friends. Everything will be exactly the same. That my dear readers is where the problem arises.

Frank/Francine gets attacked by bloodthirsty pirates??? NO! Are you even paying attention? Pirates don't even make sense in this story. Besides, this story is more of a sorry attempt to get a point across. Maybe I'll save the pirates for another time. No, Frank is safe from any pirates. Though I think Francine may have a crush on the captain.

Where was I? Oh yes, the problem. The problem is that nothing has changed. That they have decided to do everything exactly like they have done before. Frank/Francine is now facing a dillema. What do they do now?

You see, they fell for this person through the friendship. The attraction arised while the friendship grew. By doing exactly what they are doing now, Frank grew to have feelings for the girl. Doing exactly the same thing probably means those feelings are going to stay around and play for awhile.

So what does Frank/Francine do? And no, he doesn't walk the plank. Please stop thinking about pirates. Sheesh.

Frank could let the girl of his affection know that keeping things exactly the same is making it hard on him. He thinks that they should take a break. Or the very least. tone the friendship down a little. Maybe not open up to each other or spend as much time together.

You know what? He won't. He liked this person. He likes the attention he gets. He loves spending time with this person. This person is probably someone who is the highlight of his day. This is someone who he holds very special. He looks forward to these moments with this person. As much as he gets hurt by spending time. As much as his feeling stick around because nothing between them has changed. Frank doesn't want to alter the relationship because deep down he still wants to be with this person. He still cherishes spending the time that they have.

It's a catch 22. Frank is hurt if he keeps on letting the friendship remain the same. Frank is also hurt if he ends up spending less time with his dear friend. No one likes losing a friend. Especially a friend that you have strong attachment.

I feel sorry for poor Frank. Afterall, I hear some pirates just took all his loot. Those jerks.